Early in my journey I had a difficult time receiving service gracefully for lots of reasons

I was fortunate to take on a submissive partner who was significantly more experienced than I was, that helped me practice and learn how to be a better service receiver and understand the mindset of service oriented folks. They also helped me understand that I too was service oriented in a way.

Common Hurdles for Service Receivers

1. Feeling Worthy
   1. Who am I to have this person want to do things for me?
   2. Why me, in particular?
2. Skepticism
   1. What do they get out of this?
   2. What are their motivations?
3. You Don’t Want What Is Offered
   1. But I don’t want/need this?
   2. I don’t even like _____!
4. Uncertainty (Expectations)
   1. Do they have any expectations of me in this service arrangement?
   2. If so, what are they?
5. Trust (Control vs. Service)
   1. Raven Kaldera “control is ‘Do as I say’ and service is ‘Do what I want’”
   2. Will this person really do what I want?

Things Service Receivers Should Consider or Remember

1. Receiving service gracefully is not intuitive for everyone, for many it takes work and practice, it’s ok you are one of them.
2. If you are offered service, the offeror wants to serve you, they’ve already deemed you worthy, don’t take away their agency by judging yourself unworthy, instead challenge yourself to be worthy of it.